“Dr. Phil may be wise, but I’ll always go back to Dr. Suess for a 2nd opinion!” – Snowy Impressions
Being a productive member of society is a lot of work. Yes, it does involve giving back to society in positive ways. And at times there are things or people that get in the way of you doing that. At times it can be financial burdens and woes, then other times it might just be the company you keep, that is keeping you down. As for myself, I am not on the Forbes list of millionaires and can not contribute to society that way, but I try to uplift the spirits of those around me. Yes, it takes work, because, a person themselves can not uplift, unless you are at a certain level of contentment with your own life. I can not inspire you to be happy, unless I am happy, Just like a millionaire can not give or donate money unless they have it to donate. So, where the millionaire goes out, does what he has to do to get that money to donate and live himself, a person that takes the time to inspire needs to be around people of positive influence and understanding. Like a millionaire to be makes a check list of things he/she needs to do to achieve that level of financial independence, the pros and cons lists, so does a person who wants to lead a life of inspiration, they need to succumb to a great level of inner peace. To achieve this, there is one greater thing one needs to avoid and that is toxic people. The word toxic is not directed at someone who uses foul language in this case, it is a way of being towards others around them, to others they feel intimidated by. Here is 5 traits of someone who is toxic
1. On approach they raise their nose in the air. – Meaning they look down at you, make you feel like you are less than they are.
2. They make, patronizing, snobbish, condescending comments towards you.
3. They talk about you behind your back, in a negative way, to other friends and even family members.
4. You find when you are around them, you feel like you’re walking on eggshells, afraid to say or do what they may see as wrong, leading them to come down on you with those condescending remarks.
5. When you have a new idea or a point of view, they belittle it, tell you why they think it won’t work, find anything and everything wrong with your idea.
I have been told many times that I inspire others and I have been told to inspire, one has to have gone through their own hardships to be able to feel empathy, not pity. Yes, I do pity, I pity the person who sees me as a threat, before evening talking to me, but have come to the conclusion I am a threat through the talk of someone who is toxic. There will always be toxic people around us, till the day we leave this earth. They come in the form of friends and even family and I will admit that to this day, I am still confronted with people of toxic nature, which does break my heart, especially when I am insulted before listened to. These days physically, I do not have the strength to stand up to toxic people, I have decided to avoid them, detach from them because the stress in itself can cause me more damage physically. This is my way of dealing with it, a must for me. We are all allowed to do what we feel comfortable doing when it comes to toxic people in our lives, because we are the person living the life. Do what is right for you, but at the end of the day, I hope and pray it is a decision that brings a smile to your face and a restful nights sleep.
So, take the time to give to soceity, at what ever level you can, and even not expecting something in return, still, it will come back to you 10 folds and if its 10 smiles or 10 thousand dollars, hey a reward is a reward, right?
If there is one thing I get total energy from, it is deep conversations, which can be about something as simple as thoughts on whether or not there is another universe, well, whether myself or the person I am in a conversation believe there is. And not being a scientist of any sort, anything myself or a friend may voice with regards is purely speculation.
The only thing we can be accurate about is ourselves, right? I mean who knows me better than me? Who knows you, better than you? And who cares what other people think of us, yes at times it can be enlightening and that is on one of our defenceless days, yet more often than not, we are usually insulted by what others think.
I think what we need to do before getting all up in arms when someone gives us a description of how they perceive us to be, is ask them why they see us that way and just maybe we can learn from it or if we plan on spending a life in total solitude, who cares if we change our ways or not?
It’s not easy being under a microscope, especially when the eye looking down is not your own. I don’t think we will ever truly understand the actions, the characters of all the people in our lives, but if we give thought to what others do say, maybe we can better ourselves to a greater degree. I like a person who has a bit of mystery to them. I mean, even the great Steven Hawking hasn’t figured it all out, he professing yet to be mystified by the female gender.
A Spiritual Teacher told me a couple years ago..
”Be weary of those who speak from both sides of their mouths. Words can be lies and actions can be truths.”
This is so true and I think we all have experienced such a person in our lives at least once. We can not take such people personally, for their actions are their own burdens to carry, their lessons to learn from and it may take many lessons before they learn, as that burden weighs them down.
Here is a portion of a write up I found with regards ..Taken from blifaloo.com
• Physical expression will be limited and stiff, with few arm and hand movements. Hand, arm and leg movement are toward their own body the liar takes up less space.
• A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact.
• Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear. Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand.
• Timing and duration of emotional gestures and emotions are off a normal pace. The display of emotion is delayed, stays longer it would naturally, then stops suddenly.
• Timing is off between emotions gestures/expressions and words. Example: Someone says “I love it!” when receiving a gift, and then smile after making that statement, rather then at the same time the statement is made.
• Gestures/expressions don’t match the verbal statement, such as frowning when saying “I love you.”
• Expressions are limited to mouth movements when someone is faking emotions (like happy, surprised, sad, awe, )instead of the whole face. For example; when someone smiles naturally their whole face is involved: jaw/cheek movement, eyes and forehead push down, etc.
Obviously, just because someone exhibits one or more of these signs does not make them a liar. The above behaviors should be compared to a persons base (normal) behavior whenever possible.
Tell the liar that he/she only has a single option. This is done by suggesting that ONLY TRUTH will save any remains of the friendship, or that the friendship will be lost forever when the truth reveals itself by other means.