Don’t Worry About Me

Trying harder on some days than others to be even a little light in some one else’s day gets exhausting, especially when so many are blind to the sparks of life. I made a vow years ago, to be that person, yet not make it my job to carry other people’s problems on my shoulders or even think I can fix them, because I can’t. It can be a very lonely world at times for people like me. And that statement alone will make others wonder what the hell does she mean, people like her? Well if you don’t know me by now, maybe you really are not suppose to know me at all? Even in my loneliness I find serenity. It is at those times we I recuperated and listen to the thoughts of the Creator to rejuvenate my soul, my spiritual self. There is so much I want to practice, yet time is short, days and years are quickly creeping by and I don’t really notice just how fast until it is my birthday again and again. Nothing and no one lasts forever on this planet, some things and people gone too early, or is the timing perfect with regards? With those thoughts, I learn not to take things for granted and live in the moment. My mind goes blank when people ask me about any future plans, again because I believe all we have is the here and now.

So I will take my lonely days to build back up my loss of faith, as days of grace. I will just listen to the sounds of Mother Earth, look for signs from the Creator and begin a new day once my heart is full once again, with a bounty to share.

Everything in it’s time and timing is everything. Remember, even feeling lonely is something to learn from, give it time.

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My Twins Within

“My wisdom for the day, after 1 cup of coffee, is to simply define what I call, the twins, Dharma & Karma. Dharma is that child that can live within me for life. Karma is that child that can leave home, but guaranteed being, the prodigal child.. will always come back home. It’s never too late to practice some self loving, mindful Dharma, then good ole Karma will naturally come back to me, through others, in a good way.” – Snowy

All Pictures No Words

 

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I am amazed at the creative eye of photographers, amateurs and professionals. Like a writer has a way with words, a photographer has a way with vision.

I have family and friends who are the amateurs and the pros when it comes to the art of vision and they all fascinate me, always, no matter what they are looking at.

Below is a link to just a few photos taken by a friend.. use your eyes to see, then use your words to leave comment. 🙂

Mike Garratty’s Photo Albums

If You Knew You Were Dying

I heard today about someone who has just been told they have terminal cancer and a month to live. I don’t think we all understand just how precious life on earth is. How has a teen and young adult, we all have put ourselves in harms way, so many times and come out of it okay. How as we get older we begin to settle, get complacent, taking loved ones for granted, assuming the world will be the same tomorrow as it was today. Then in a split second, things change & we begin to question, why? or wish we had reached out just one more time to that person who has passed on or praised that child at the supper table for passing the grade instead of having our eyes on the television. How we should of made a phone call to Mom or Dad when we thought of it and not waited. Life is so short and I so appreciate any time I am given and try to live the best way I can.

What would you say to someone if you knew they would not be here tomorrow? What you waiting for?? Tell them now.

One Day At A Time

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That simple sentence says so much to so many, those recovering. And to be completely honest I think every one would benefit from experiencing the meaning behind all it is, the 12 step program. It is a great teaching program, we all go through some hard times in our lives and find it hard to cope on a day to day basis. The 12 step shows you how to face the demons, one day at a time. No one is perfect, we all reach out at some point.
Having worked in the addictions field, I found it to be the most rewarding job ever. To see someone at their lowest, climb to the point of being able to cope and learning to live one day at a time. I read the Big Book and want to read it again. I watched all the videos and experienced the program daily.

Today I wondered through a 2nd hand store and seen shelves of books. I love books! I especially love the old non-fiction reads, they show just how much the times have changed. My eyes fell upon a title, Lois Remembers. It is the memoirs of the co-founder of Al-Anon and wife of the co-founder of Alcoholic Anonymos Bill W.
This book I have not read! And I am so looking forward to reading it. I will start this evening and will give my thoughts when done.

If you have read it, what is your thoughts?

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~Lois Remembers Memoirs of the Co-founder of Al-Anon & wife of the Co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous. Lois W. is the co-founder of the Al-Anon Family Groups & the widow of Bill W., co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous. Here she recalls her childhood and life in Brooklyn as the protected daughter of a leading doctor, and her romantic marriage to Bill during World War I. She also tells how AA and Al-Anon started and how they have brought hope to more than a million alcoholics and those who love them. She recalls idyllic summer days in beautiful rural Vermont and long hiking and motorcycling trips with Bill. Later came darker times when she and Bill tried vainly to conquer his illness of Alcoholism. Then Bill’s spiritual awakening led to his meeting with Dr. Bob S. in Akron, Ohio, and the formation of Alcoholics Anonymous. Lois tells how the 12 Steps and the 12 Traditions grew out of the early experiences of AA members and groups, and were later adopted by Al-Anon. Her steadfast support and love for Bill were important throughout their marriage, but she found she needed her own program of recovery. Out of this need and that of other spouses and children of alcoholics grew Al-Anon for alcoholics’ families and friends, and Alateen for their children.~

Appreciating Who I Am & Who You Are

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Its not always easy to understand another persons heritage or culture, why they do the
things they do with regards. I believe ignorance plays a big part when anyone comes to their
own conclusion thinking they know another persons culture, coming across as very critical.

We all come from somewhere, someone and no one should be discounted in any way.
There is a new wave it seems with regards to the native culture and non-natives. The non-natives
are wanting to experience the native culture, which is a great thing, but what part are
they wanting to experience? I think to some degree they are not sure themselves, but sense
something great about the native man/woman/child. The beauty of the native person is their
spirituality, this is what I think is the magnet to non natives.

This is all my personal thoughts with regards and don’t speak for any other native or non-native.
Being on the internet there is no shortage of definitions with regards to spirituality,
native or not and just like you can’t believe everything you are told, we should not believe
everything we read either. I guess one could say you’re on a vision quest, you need a
change in your life and or you’re wondering what you should do with the rest of your life
which can be so confusing most of the time. The road is never a straight and narrow one,
things are always changing, most of the time it is an uphill battle and we ask the question
why?

I do believe any vision quest does not end till we are well into our adult hood, having
experienced so much of life, and live to tell about it. There are times when we meet up with
someone that we do not consider to be an elder yet they seem so wise and that is usually
because they have been through a lot in their young lives, sorted it out, learnt the lesson and
is able to relay the answers to some questions more easily than others. We are all born with
the ability to create meaning for our own lives and it does not happen over night, it is a
process of growth, first physically, then spiritually through coming of age.. so the vision quest
was and still is in the defining moment in a persons life when they come to terms with all that
has happened, can honestly say, without regret, and have a peace of mind spiritually.

I do believe in a Higher Power, something greater than myself and I also believe that any hill
I climb in my life is so I can relate to another who has climbed the same hill, so I can have a
greater sense of empathy, maybe I am wrong and this is just my way of not going crazy
when things don’t go smoothly. I told a friend not long ago, now when I am in pain, I begin to pray, at times in tears, I don’t ask ‘why me?’, anymore in prayer, I ask for healing.

That is a part of my spirituality, a part of who I am, because I know that
there is someone out there in greater pain than I and I don’t have to watch television to see it
or hear about it on the radio, there are people in some sort of pain around all of us daily. We
can not fix the whole world but we can help a friend, a family member or a neighbor, making
changes in our own world and in doing so, others do the same and on and on.

I am so proud of my native heritage and even more so, I am proud to be ME, native or
not..

Residential School Survivor

My father was and is ojibway, born in 1935 and passed over in 2006. He was put in a residential school at northern ontario when young. He was a strong man and at times I think he was stronger than he realized or gave himself credit for. Life for Dad was not easy which made life with Dad not so easy. However, later in my life, I forgave him and loved him like only a daughter could love a father.

I have been thinking of him alot lately and was told he walks by my side protecting me, being my gaurdian angel, going that extra mile that he feels he did not walk while here on earth. I feel he has, many times over, but I like the warmth of heart I feel knowing he is near, beside me he will walk.

I come across a song on this blog site, that when I listened to it as I typed away, my father come to mind again, in the words. So, I put the song, a few pictures of those, residential school days in a video.

“Spiritually I am native and that can never be taken away.” ~ Snowy

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In 2009, Chief Fontaine had a meeting with Pope Benedict XVI to try to obtain an apology for abuses that occurred in the residential school system.[38] The audience was funded by Indian and Northern Affairs Canada. Following the meeting, the Vatican released an official statement on the church’s role in residential schools:

His Holiness recalled that since the earliest days of her presence in Canada, the Church, particularly through her missionary personnel, has closely accompanied the indigenous peoples. Given the sufferings that some indigenous children experienced in the Canadian Residential School system, the Holy Father expressed his sorrow at the anguish caused by the deplorable conduct of some members of the Church and he offered his sympathy and prayerful solidarity. His Holiness emphasized that acts of abuse cannot be tolerated in society. He prayed that all those affected would experience healing, and he encouraged First Nations Peoples to continue to move forward with renewed hope.

Fontaine later stated at a news conference that at the meeting, he sensed the Pope’s “pain and anguish” and that the acknowledgement was “important to me and that was what I was looking for.”