1 Step Or 12 Steps?


About a year ago, I met a man with his own beliefs on alcoholics and alcoholism. He said he wasn’t an alcoholic anymore because he quit drinking. So to me that meant he was in denial. And why do I say that?
Because I worked in addictions and come from a family of alcoholics.
To work in that field, I took it upon myself to read all the material, watch all the videos, talked to the clients and even did a mock profile. From Friday night to Monday morning, I was a night watch person at residential, having up to 14 clients in my care and seen that programming was done as well. During the rest of the week I worked in administration as a counsellor trainee. I was learning from both sides of the coin, the addicts and the counsellor.
Most recently I seen a commercial with regards to a center that agrees with the logic of this gentleman I had met a year ago. I am not going to give the name of the center because I don’t want to promote something I don’t believe in. However I will give you an idea of their philosophy

They do not believe that drug and alcohol dependency is a disease. Instead, they believe it is the result of one or more of the following four causes:

Chemical imbalance
Unresolved events from the past
Beliefs you hold that are inconsistent with what is true
Inability to cope with current conditions

That, anyone who is abusing drugs and alcohol is doing so because of one or more of these four causes. Through extensive research and direct experience, they believe addiction is not the primary problem but rather the symptom of a deeper underlying issue.
They believe that addiction was viewed as an incurable disease accompanied by hopelessness, stigma, and shame. That they have found a better way. Instead, they approach addiction as a completely treatable condition.

These centers offer these treatments –

Acupressure and Massage
Adventure therapy
Art therapy
Biochemical repair
Blood chemistry analysis
Chemical dependency counselling
Equine assisted therapy
Life purpose therapy
Marriage and family therapy
Meditation therapy
Nutrition counselling
Physical fitness
Ropes course
Sound therapy
Spiritual counselling
Tai chi

They also have, stores on location, bookstores that offer Books, Audio CDs, and Merchandise such as hoodies and T-shirts. With statements such as,
Give yourself or a loved one the gift of empowerment today!!..

Then you have the AA 12 step program, with ONE book, The Big Book, each client reading the same book and at times while in the program given another book to read while at the center that will focus on an issue they are having. But the entire program is focusing on the individual and their minds are not clouded with all this glorified products, costing a client dollars, along with massages and such.
Going for treatment is not a holiday!

Alcoholics Anonymous is a voluntary, worldwide fellowship of men and women from all walks of life who meet together to attain and maintain sobriety. The only requirement for membership is a desire to strop drinking. There are no dues or fees for A.A. membership.
By keeping alcohol out of their systems, newcomers take care of one part of their illness – their bodies have a chance to get well. There is another part. If they are going to stay sober, they need healthy minds and healthy emotions, too. So they begin to straighten out their confused thinking and unhappy feelings by following A.A.’s “Twelve Steps” to recovery. These Steps suggest ideas and actions that can guide alcoholics toward happy and useful lives.
And the 12 steps are..

1. We admitted we were powerless over alcohol – that our lives had become unmanageable.

2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity.

3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understood Him.

4. Made a searching and fearless moral inventory of ourselves.

5. Admitted to God, to ourselves and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

6. Were entirely ready to have God remove all these defects of character.

7. Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings.

8. Made a list of all persons we had harmed, and became willing to make amends to them all.

9. Made direct amends to such people wherever possible, except when to do so would injure them or others.

10. Continued to take personal inventory and when we were wrong promptly admitted it.

11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for knowledge of His will for us and the power to carry that out.

12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to alcoholics and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

AA members will usually emphasize to newcomers that only problem drinkers themselves, individually, can determine whether or not they are in fact alcoholics.

At the same time, it will be pointed out that all available medical testimony indicates that alcoholism is a progressive illness, that it CANNOT BE CURED in the ordinary sense of the term, but that it can be arrested through total abstinence from alcohol in any form.

So I guess at the end of the day, it is up to the individual, do you want the spa like treatment or a program where, The heart of it is of personal recovery and is contained in Twelve Steps?

Single? ~ Don’t Say It Like It’s A Bad Thing

November 2015, will be my 10 year being single anniversary.. Wow! How time is flying. They say not to look ahead, concentrate on this moment and I do, but after a certain age, you begin to wonder about any tomorrows you’re blessed with..LOL..

The 10th year is known as, traditionally called the tin or aluminium anniversary. On the modern list, it is referred to as the diamond jewellery anniversary. I have to laugh at that.. Tin or aluminium?.. I thought it was, a Knight in Shining Armour!? But I am liking the diamond idea. Just maybe over the next year I will be courted and presented with a diamond in 2015 by my Knight to end the long drought!..lol..

Fire Water


“Touch not the poisonous firewater that makes wise men turn to fools and robs the spirit of its vision.”
–Tecumseh, SHAWNEE

It’s not an accident that firewater is also called spirits. Firewater affects our judgments. The Great Spirit created a set of laws and principles by which we are to live our lives. When we have problems we should pray and ask for the wisdom of these laws. If instead we turn to liquor, our judgement will be affected. It is the decision and choice made under the influence of booze that causes us to be fools. We need to learn to lean on prayer and not on the spirits of alcohol.

Great Spirit, teach me to pray. Let not one drop of liquor touch my lips today.

Define Me! Judge Me!


Define: to explain or identify the nature or essential qualities of; describe:
Judge: to form an opinion or estimate:

We can not live a life on this earth without being defined or judged by others. The question is do we listen to those definitions and judgements? Some may say, yes to the positives and nay to the negatives. Yet for myself, I want to say yes to the negatives as well. Even if the words hurt at the time, once I give it some thought, I can change for the better. I strive to be better than any expectations and at the end of the day, as I have been saying for the past few years.. I am selfish.. I will take what you have to give and use it to my best interest.
Judge and define away!!

Went To The River & Found Spirit

(This blog I dedicate to the Memory of my brother, Joey, who while on earth was a messenger of Love as God asked of him)

Once upon a time, a spiritualist, came to town to motivate people, by giving them the tools necessary to achieve a joyful life and how to appreciate each day they are given on this earth.

However the church did not like the idea of this spiritualist coming into town and corrupting the population. Corrupting?

Leo Pfeffer is quoted, “”…if you believe in it, it is a religion or perhaps ‘the’ religion;
and if you do not care one way or another about it, it is a sect; but if you fear and hate it, it is a cult.”

So, according to you, which is the cult?

Myself, I don’t fear a person or a group that empower and motivates people to live successful, happy and enthusiastic lives. I do fear a religion that says..

Deuteronomy 18:10-13
New International Version (NIV)
10 Let no one be found among you who sacrifices their son or daughter in the fire, who practices divination or sorcery, interprets omens, engages in witchcraft, 11 or casts spells, or who is a medium or spiritist or who consults the dead. 12 Anyone who does these things is detestable to the Lord; because of these same detestable practices the Lord your God will drive out those nations before you. 13 You must be blameless before the Lord your God.

Wives, be subject to your husbands as you are to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife just as Christ is the head of the church, the body of which he is the Savior. (Ephesians 5: 22-23)

I do a lot of reading about different subjects because I like to write and I also talk to people about a lot of subjects for the same reason, just take out the titles Master and Slave and you have, another group that believes the same, that the man aka husband is the head of the wife..

Masters and Slaves in the world of Dominance and Submission where, a slave’s primary purpose in life is to serve the needs and desires of the Master. The slave relinquishes all control to the Master, because the slave knows the Master has her well-being totally at heart.

A spiritualist beliefs are about personal well being, both physical and psychological, which is a very important part of modern spirituality. A person develops inner peace and happiness. Spirituality has played a central role in self-help movements such as Alcoholics Anonymous also. Having worked in that field, I have seen what being spiritual guidance can do for a person and it does not tear down a persons self worth like a cult of certain, “religions”, can do.

As far as I am concerned, there is ONE God, which we all pray to, it is just we, as humans, who pray differently, depending on what church you attend or don’t attend. And I don’t think one can judge another because they don’t pray a like or believe alike.

Why do certain religions try to scare people into believing that they will be punished for any act that is labelled a sin according to man? In the beginning, the native praised the world, the water, the animals, we praised it all and were thankful for what was before us. Then the Europeans come along and poison the waters, the earth, the animals to extinction and pollute the minds of the native who took care of their world. I found a quote by, Annie Dillard.

Eskimo: “If I did not know about God and sin, would I go to hell?” Priest: “No, not if you did not know.” Eskimo: “Then why did you tell me?””

We were not broke, so what was there to fix?? And now we have people who are following the Spiritual path and helping others to tend to the spirit, only to be condemned once again by certain churches

I know there is an entity greater than myself out there and HE has nothing to do with who is master, who is slave, who is husband or who is wife. HE loves me no matter what my role or title is on this earth.

And I do not believe God detests anyone!!.. I do not fear God, I welcome him, love him and there is no relation among the 2 words, FEAR and LOVE.

I will not judge anyone and their beliefs and I don’t expect anyone forcing their beliefs onto me or judge me for what I believe in.

For some reason, the moral of this story is leading me to feel, FOOTLOOSE and fancy free. J

Wonderful Wednesday: Thoughts From And Of Art Solomon, Anishinaabe Elder


Amazing man!..

Originally posted on Reflections On The Outdoors Naturally:

“The traditional way of education was by example, experience, and storytelling. The first principle involved was total respect and acceptance of the one to be taught, and that learning was a continuous process from birth to death. It was total continuity without interruption. Its nature was like a fountain that gives many colours and flavours of water and that whoever chose could drink as much or as little as they wanted to whenever they wished. The teaching strictly adhered to the sacredness of life whether of humans, animals or plants.” - Art Solomon, Anishinaabe Elder

“There comes a time when we must stop crying and wringing our hands and get on with the healing that we are so much in need of” - Art Solomon, Anishinaabe Elder

Look at our brokenness. We know that in all creation only the human family has strayed from the sacred way.  We know that we…

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Divorced/Separated? Who gets the friends and family?

Young Couple Seated Back To Back

In the past few years, one thing I have noticed is how many people/friends, 40 years and older are single, after a long term relationship, men and women and it seems to be growing. I bet in this town alone, just in friends, I can count 10 and the greater number of those is women. So when you think of those people and the friends they had when they were a couple in that long relationship, then there’s the break up for whatever reason, who gets the friends? How does a friend figure that out? This is not a perfect world, thats for sure. If it was, they say, those little elves would be baking cookies in a tree trunk!.. sorry, still hungry.. ;)..anyway, how do you sort.. friends and family.. when you leave a relationship? Or if you’re the friend, what do you do or did you do?