Stronger Relationships

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If I have an itch I scratch it

If I have a thought, I express it.

That is just the way I am.

And now turning 53 years young on March 6th, I am thinking of what hasn’t changed in my life and what has changed. Whether for the better or the worse. I truly believe my relationships have changed and I am going to say for the better. My relationships with man woman and or child. And it is not because they have changed, it is because I have. When it comes to emotional relationships, I do tend to want what I put in, back from the other person, mainly, respect. And I do get it back 99% of the time. When I don’t, then I back away from the relationship, blood related or not. Some times 2 people are just not on the same page in life. You can’t fit a square peg into a round hole. I think most relationships go bad, end bad, because there is all this forcing of trying to make them work. One or the other is ramming that square peg and it is just not going in, leaving one or both hurt, angry and resentful.

I have faith that if a relationship is right for both, not perfect, but truly functional, two people can agree to disagree with ease and not hold grudges.

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I have come to realize that no matter how much times have changed, no matter how strong and independent a woman may become over the years., with education, a career and meeting all the expectations she sets on herself, she still wants a man who is stronger. Which can be hard at times because the woman has trained herself to be her own leader, self-sufficient that on the days when she just wishes for that strong man, it is still hard for her to give into that. It is no secret that to be able to submit to someone, you have to respect them, trust them, allow them to take the reins maybe 90% of the time.

I really think in the past 50 years women have climbed the ladder of life, we have proven ourselves 10 fold and not that we should have had anything to prove to anyone else than ourselves, but we did it, we know we can do it, we know we can live a life or security by ourselves and raise children if it came down to that. However we are not born to be alone. We all need partners or there will forever be an empty space in our hearts. Many will argue that point with me, and I will gladly take on debate with regards.

So next, what role does a man play in a strong woman’s life? He was born to be a leader, a care taker naturally and do a degree over those 50 years, they have been stripped of certain duties and have become more of the submissive part, accepting the female for the strong being she is in all aspects of their life. Yet at the end of the day, both are still sitting on the edge of the chairs, sensing something is just not right.

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I am not saying men are correct or the woman is correct. I just believe we all have roles to play and when we take someone’s authority away, their sense of responsibility fades away also. And then when a woman is looking for that, strong partner, he is not there, because so much of his authority was set on her shoulders and then she gets upset because he is not acting responsible in the relationship. And that is something that can not be denied. I can’t count how many times we women complain about what our partners don’t do in the relationship and what they do that just irks us to no end. We complain over and over.

Then I see those relationships, where the woman does work out of the home, the man works out of the home, but once she is done her 8 hours at work, she can come home and know that her partner will take on his authority roll to rule the roost, whether it be with the children, sons and daughters, both needing to see the strength of their father for the life they will lead when they leave home. So the son knows how to be responsible, how to treat any female in his life and the daughter sees how she should be treated by any male that may come into her life, respectful and made to feel like a queen, leading her to treat her partner like a king.

As for my single friends and myself being single, I have learnt to seek a man, who, has grown into the image of my Higher Power/God at this age. I say that because I know that God will not judge me, will accept me for who I am , for all my shortcomings, for just being me! I am not perfect, no man is perfect, but the love we share together can be perfect, when we learn to let down the walls that we built and just love.

I posted a graphic sometime ago and it said..

I will dance with God and he will let the perfect man for me cut in.

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8 thoughts on “Stronger Relationships

  1. Yes I agree with you,Sometimes you must just be a woman and not do it all. Women’s lib is a great thing but you have to find your balance in the relationship. Respect for each other is so important.

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  2. A lot of what you have said has merit and sence about it. Though in this part of the comment some will say we are sexist, yet we offer otherwise just realalistic. Tis the nature of the beast to obey the master. Twas less than 100 years ago women were just chatel, property of their husbands, therefore most obeying the wishes of the man with no question. When even the few women got the emancipation enacted most women kept to the old ways and furthed installed them into/onto their daughters. In reality it was not until the 60’s that women started to assert themselves openly and where derided for it in the mans world. Slowly though more and more followed suit leading to higher divorce rates as if they gave in and surrendered their individuality then subjigation would set in again and the struggle would have been for naught. We find though nowadays quite a few ” strong willed ” women have been hurt and put up a protective shell as to not let men in to get hurt again. Each relationship is different based on indivduality, cultures & needs. A woman and man both bring something to it , weaknesses and strengths which creates a harmony. Though over time it seems our hearing gets worse and our part in the harmony goes off leading to a tune offkey. This is then time to go and get tested, which most put off doing leading to deafness. Compare then to the marriage when it starts to go offkey then is the time to seek help and not let it degress to the point of no return. To try and always be the strongest in a realationship is doomed. For to carry the weight of the world on one’s shoulders will cause one to become stooped over and only see the ground and not the faces of ones’ loved ones. Honour-Respect-Care-Share

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    1. Thank you for commentin James, I have come to look forward to your thoughts. I may talk of the past, we are to a great degree, products of our enviroments, yet if change is needed, only they self can make it…and I don’t carry the past with me in my pocket.. I adore men, everything about a man, their strength all mighty. I was in a 30 yr relationship and would not dare set those 30 yrs on another man’s shoulders..lol.. how devastating that would be.. not just for the man but for me! Yes..Honour-Respect-Care-Share! 🙂

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      1. Not to be disrespectfull or callus yet how do you express ” share ” as there is no word for it in the Ojibway/Cree language?

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  3. Also am wondering about your moniker ” Snowy ” ? A name reveals things about a person. So what would Snowy be for? See no white in what hair of yours we can see so not that. Snowy for an area you live in buried by that stuff do not think so. Snowy for the wise old snow owl who can defy the adversity of a harsh enviroment this one make more sense only the snow owl is an omen of evil in the Ojibway culture. So give us an idea about it.

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  4. No disrespect taken James.. and I do believe in my native culture.. that.. ‘actions’ speak louder than any words at times… ‘share’ is an action.. unconditionaly. 🙂

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  5. LOL.. @ my nic Snowy… Ok, well, I got my nickname during the winter season.. a season that I find very peaceful.. a season that I love for the serenity.. being a spiritual person… My name is Cynthia.. aka Artemis.. the moon Goddess/hunter.. I am a pisces.. the dreamer and romantic.. so Snowy seems to be fitting.. a combination of pure spirituality.. forever changing like a snowflake, one never the same as the other… 😉

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